This story is about my new best friends. I met them at a museum.

Not certain about you folks, but I really like visiting art museums.

Some museums are really big deals. I mean marble floors, docents, and national treasures and stuff. These places have a lot of history and it is really amazing that they get the huge funding required to even exist.

Other museums may be a bit more off the beaten path. Less on budget and huge on creativity. You may see amazing works from artists you have never heard of. Or you may see Mt. Rushmore recreated with Shrimp flavored Ramen noodles.

Just sayin…it’s a big world out there.

However THIS particular story is not that.

This story contains much less sodium than the Ramen museum, and takes place a few years back. Back when I was young and handsome.

I mean, heh, heh, handsome being pretty subjective.

Gentle Reader: Apparently so is “young” in your book

Eric C Hudson: OUCH! Way to make an entrance Gentle Reader! Not cool!

GR: I’m just sayin…Whatever helps you sleep at night. You want let’s get back to this writing thing?

ECH: Ahem…ANYWAYS…. I was younger…and I occasionally visited a museum or two…if I remember me, it was usually on free entry days.

On this particular museum visit, I found myself walking through the same exhibits as a couple ahead of me.

And this is their story.

GR: Ooooh enticing! I love it!

ECH: I know right?

So this couple, lets call them Cheryl and Daryl just cause, well, I don’t know what their names were and we gotta call them something. I mean we could call them Thing 1 and Thing 2 but..you know..

GR: Lawsuit

ECH: Bingo…So lets take a look at our new best friends Cheryl & Daryl!

Our New Best Friends Cheryl and Daryl

New Best Friend CHERYL!
Wearing her favorite spring ensemble! The one with that cool pattern on it? Cause it is a day out? You know those days when you just look good and feel good? That was Cheryl!

GR: She sounds lovely! Hey, quick question though…and I may be guessing here…

ECH: Oh no…

GR: You meant to put in a picture of a “spring ensemble” there didn’t you?

ECH:…yeah….

GR: And is that actually a picture of a string ensemble? Over there? In that box?

ECH: …yeah….I had a typo in my search bar…I didn’t think anyone would notice that…

GR: For reals?!?

ECH: Well and then I got hungry, and then I had cheesy fingers, and thought I would get back to it later…Can we just get back to the story?

GR: Sweet Mother…Please

New Best Friend DARYL!
His ensemble for a day of culture includes board shorts and…is that a Mark Messier NY Rangers Jersey? I am almost positive he was wearing shoes, but don’t quote me on that.

Again, no judgement, we all have our hobbies and likes and dislikes. However, as yours truly watches from the sidelines, it is glaringly apparent that this artwork afternoon was not Daryl’s idea.

So this is going to be interesting…

Let’s Go Museum-ing! Room 1 Landscape Paintings

CHERYL: Ooooh Honey! What do you think of this painting? It is like the mountains are jumping out at you!

DARYL: Oh yeah…..I can see it….so jumping….

CL: Ooooh Honey! I don’t know about this other one one….it looks too modern for my tastes….maybe this is what the kids like nowadays?

DL: Oh yeah…mmmmhmmmm….jumping kids…

So you see how it is going right?

Nothing crazy? Some paintings you like, some you don’t and you move on. I think we have all been Cheryl and Daryl.

I dug the landscapes there. But I loved walking behind Cheryl and Daryl and listening to the commentary even more.

Room 2 Still Life Paintings

CHERYL: Ooooh Honey! What do you think of this one? It is like the grapes are jumping out at you!

DARYL: Oh yeah…mmmhmmm….i can see it…jumping grapes….

CL: Ooooh Honey! Some of these old still lifes have a lot of dead geese!

DL: Oh yeah…mmmmhmmmm….i can see em…dead geese….

So you see what we are talking about here…

The rest of the day with Cheryl and Daryl was more of the same. However you could feel Cheryl’s excitement. Stopping at times to comment, trying to engage Daryl.

Daryl, however was not engaged. Daryl was on auto pilot…Daryl’s brain was wondering when the Rangers game was coming on later.

That is…until he saw the Rothko.

GENTLE READER Oooh! Dramatic!

ECH I know right? I am trying to sound like a writer….you know with proper writing and stuff?

GR Totally! I am SO feeling that! So, what happens next?!

Daryl saw the Rothko….

Gentle Reader, I was not a big Rothko guy then….I didn’t really know much about him….but this painting was large..as I now know are most of his. Possibly 5’ square. It was primarily a field of yellow with a horizontal orange line cutting through it. If you know Rothko it was just a typical piece. But it commanded your attention. I mean there were many artist’s pieces in the room….But none of them had the weight of this massive field of yellow hanging on the wall.

Here come Cheryl & Daryl…making their way through the room once again….

CHERYL: Ooooh Honey! What do you think of this one? (Pointing at a painting by Miro or something) It is like the stringy, squiggly lines are jumping out at you!

DARYL: Oh yeah…mmmhmmm….squiggles….

CL: Okay Honey! I don’t see anything in this room that I’m interested in. But you know, I hear the next exhibit…

DL: Now hold on just a minute….

***

Awww yeah…

It was like that.

***

CHERYL: Yes Honey?

DARYL: So what the hell is going on over here?! (Pointing to the Rothko)

CHERYL: Well it says here it is called…

DL: No that’s not what I mean…I mean what the hell is this about? I mean I could paint this!

CL: Well dear I’m not quite certain we could… (walking him away from the piece)

DL: Well dear nothing! (Walking right back to the piece) I mean seriously….this just pisses me off! What the hell is he trying to say here? OH! And how much did this place spend on this piece of trash? OUR tax dollars!

CL: Well dear I’m not quite certain (walking him away from the piece..again)

DL: (Pushing his way back in front of the painting) And ANOTHER thing!…

And there is my man Daryl….

Mr. “I am not an art guy”

Mr. “I am just looking at paintings for my wife”

THAT guy went on for 10 minutes in front of Mark Rothko’s artwork. TEN freaking minutes! Try doing anything for ten minutes straight! It’s a lot! (Seriously…My honeymoon? 90 seconds tops… What can I say? I was eager….)

“He went on for 10 minutes in front of Mark Rothko’s artwork. Try doing anything for ten minutes straight! (My honeymoon? 90 seconds tops… What can I say? I was eager….)”

— anonymous

As Daryl strolled through all the rooms that day:

He barely even glanced at the landscapes…

He barely gave dead geese the time of day…

None of these paintings even slowed him down.

Adobe Stock Modified by Author Because Nachos ARE for Lovers

As soon as this museum obligation was out of the way, Daryl’s Rangers game was within reach. The puck drops in an hour. In his mind, Daryl is sprinting to the Hyundai Elantra out back, wondering if they had enough cheese in the fridge to make face off nachos.

But that all changed when he saw “it”. Game time and schedule were forgotten, as were the nachos. Daryl continued his Rothko rant. His volume increased…Now Daryl was facing the painting… yelling now.

Daryl was outright yelling at a canvas on the wall—

—Created decades ago

—Created by an artist he never met

—Created by someone who died years ago.

Yeah….like that.

Artist Mark Rothko stopped Daryl dead in his tracks. Simply by how he applied paint to canvas…Rothko asked…no….demanded that Daryl stop everything, walk over and acknowledge his painting.

Apparently, Daryl did NOT like that at all.

Rothko’s painting hit Daryl in a way he did not expect. He had just spent a day looking at landscape paintings & dead geese. Suddenly, our man turns a corner and meets a square of yellow bigger than a grade school kickball team.

When a giant yellow square started bossing him around and demanded his undivided attention?

Well, I think it kinda fried Daryl’s mind.

I remember that.

“Suddenly, our man turns a corner and meets a square of yellow bigger than a grade school kickball team”

I remember not really understanding what I was seeing…but it was amazing seeing how Rothko just demanded your attention. Good OR bad. Whether I liked him or not…seeing that impact? Wow.

Gentle Reader Holy Cow that is cool

Eric I know right? I mean I had no idea who this Rothko character was….I mean I wasn’t defending him or anything…But seeing how someone who is “not” an art guy get all wound up about art? THAT was an experience for me.

GR But Eric?

ECH Yeah?

GR…I am glad you really like him and all…I mean hey..Giant blurry boxes of color…ummmm…cool?

ECH What are you getting at?

GR I mean I know this is all about how Rothko is the bees knees and all

ECH He is…correct….go on…

GR Okay I just don’t get it… I mean I understand someone getting angry about not being able to understand a painting…and getting emotionally engaged…But I can’t say I share your love/understanding of this Rothko big panels guy…I mean he painted a million of the same kinda thing right?

ECH He did…variations on a theme and you are right…it does seem like a TON of the same

GR Exactly!

ECH So I am gonna tell you a story…

CHAPTER 2 ▶️